The 100 Years Club Installment #52: The Company We Keep

Capital One Bank likes to ask you, “What’s in YOUR Wallet?”

But I’m going to ask you, “Who’s in YOUR Circle?”

As we get older and wiser, our personal and professional community evolves. Here’s my take on the five phases of relationships.

1. In school, we’re thrown together with a bunch of other kids and have to navigate who we want to live with, hang out with, and keep in touch with when we graduate.
2. During our 20s and middle years, we sometimes choose who we’re going to marry and which kids we’ll set up playdates with for our own children and pets.
3. We often select job opportunities based on how much we like company leaders and culture and whether we vibe with the people we’ll be working with.
4. As founders, we always can choose clients and projects based on personality, goals, management style, and budget.
5. In our 50s and 60s (and beyond), we sometimes re-evaluate relationships. We set boundaries with family members. Old friendships may fade away. New potential friends and “suitors” appear. People die. Kids are born. We may feel we no longer need to be “popular” (as we may have in Phases 1 and 2 and sometimes in Phase 3).

Although we may have thousands of “friends and fans” on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok, and lots of connections and engagement on LinkedIn, our true friends and supporters are a much smaller circle.

As we enter a new year, think about who you hang out with, work with, play with, and otherwise let into your circle.

Set boundaries and don’t be afraid to refresh your community, based on who brings you joy, insights, and peace.

We often cling to old relationships because they feel comfortable or they feed our egos or wallets. You may be afraid to leave a toxic work or personal situation because of fear.

But when you let the right people into your circle, your whole life feels happier and calmer. A small circle of peace is way better than a big one with lots of “faux friends” or bosses/clients/co-workers who stress us out or make us miserable.

P.S. The same applies to social media. “Hide” or unfriend people who stress you out or compel you to feel sad or annoyed.

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	How to make new friends after 60.
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